Over the last couple of years, after many therapy sessions and intentionally deciding to center my well-being, I've started to realize just how many toxic relationships I've maintained and nurtured in my life. It's a realization that's not easy to accept, especially since cutting out toxicity has become heralded as a feat in terms of self-love. If I'm not really good at it, and may be prone to relapse, do I even love myself?
Today, The FADER is premiering "Fire In My Eyes," the latest single from New York singer Susannah Cutler's forthcoming debut album, Knock Hard. Performing under the name Yours Are The Only Ears, Cutler understands there is nuance when it comes to removing yourself from bad relationships. "Fire In My Eyes" is a delicate unraveling of the many mixed emotions that manifest after breaking ties with someone who you know is bad for you, but who you also cared deeply for. There will inevitably be moments of wanting them back: "It comes in waves / I wanna take care of you some days," Cutler sings softly on the track.
"'Fire In My Eyes' was written during a traumatic breakup with a person who I heavily resented for their violent outbursts and disrespect towards me and other women in my life," Cutler writes of the song via email. "Around the same time, I met someone new who I was falling for, but I was having trouble reconciling the guilt of moving on and abandoning said person." Listen below.